tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-69763296788084997552024-02-21T06:16:27.027-08:00PREPARE THE BRIDEto know the Truth and to be set FREE by it ...Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.comBlogger20125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-2160282563710044892012-05-08T07:58:00.000-07:002012-05-08T08:10:28.173-07:0020 Book Recommendations<i>Below are 20 books that I have read, some more recently than others, but one thing that they all have in common is that they have pushed me to Jesus in a deeply profound way. Without hesitation, I suggest for you to pick up a copy of any of these books and enjoy the beauty found within their pages. It's not about a good author or good penmanship, but about us turning our hearts to God. </i><br />
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<b><u>20 Books That Have Pushed Me to Jesus (in no particular order)</u></b></div>
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<i>Click on the book image and it'll take you to a place where </i></div>
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<i>you can find out more info on the book and where you can purchase it for cheap.</i></div>
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<b>1. Radical by David Platt</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Radical-Taking-Faith-American-Dream/dp/1601422210/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336485526&sr=1-1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLBxYvVm0877xcxnrZIeENc8EYpRf20qYvVALKAgj0sVSc2rrp53qDbTFGh6zCPLYfxuVQHBAczcQR91RlH7VB4jfA803m7YJ71-Q-N1FlEi7Ol-YopyA4mrX6ixZLZz6arnVbTZehaa4/s400/Radical-David-Platt.jpg" width="255" /></a></div>
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<b>2. Lover of My Soul by Alan D. Wright</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Radical-Taking-Faith-American-Dream/dp/1601422210/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336485526&sr=1-1" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUQ_1kS0uAGp7nMoHThWPg7I0-2TOgv2yeTxuudFy97fLGRqn4z5WJGh994LWxMZ5ooA5t0h3HC-f8Fa3LyAZIM7mCtEijc8G1csgGDjDwPyqZlbPLmPEyXsf3B9nLEozVgbBdK9Tf0xY/s400/lover+of+my+soul.jpg" width="266" /></a></div>
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<b>3. No Compromise by Melody Green</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/No-Compromise-Story-Keith-Green/dp/1595551646/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336485800&sr=1-1" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLpGiLd6rjBIZawxTNwbbJgo69HdlQONqC5QhrTcigWQf2A17I-hqi1DjSwoEw-68YDUMp3oN9dIoMYNQEat9OJ2MJaSHisfpp9FGZimC-HXm5S03NBgAhx6Ymjzu_bepjSUWGnBhxPDg/s400/no+compromise.jpg" width="261" /></a></div>
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<b>4. Bittersweet by Shauna Niequist</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Bittersweet-Thoughts-Change-Grace-Learning/dp/0310328160/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336485912&sr=1-1" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhM5TaH2coHFlO1z6zJS9aFVTh-pyp4pHy8_cSf55BhphKXM39szKWsCT28hYlBGwWchK2U4R7pX_DDKQ6XNGZ05xlYSg9pPqPP45AZNk8zCZfUMihRyTUtykIK5AcLibcCrLCgmE9FMGU/s400/bittersweet_cover.jpg" width="258" /></a></div>
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<b>5. Kisses from Katie by Katie Davis</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Kisses-Katie-Story-Relentless-Redemption/dp/1451612060/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336485982&sr=1-1" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4RM9LpbzFB9cP4K7gdmUVFX0UuvjIFNJgfQvmKCybHJcBGZAKll7gy57yLzX1uq06R1knFaEwjrnDRTkeqYDJG__5C6dvWFixu4oxR9vcpW-RPUvkcmj8YO0KRerCLrks1T_UVg18cH0/s400/kisses+from+katie.jpg" width="265" /></a></div>
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<b>6. Why Revival Tarries by Leonard Ravenhill</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Why-Revival-Tarries-Leonard-Ravenhill/dp/0764229052/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336486428&sr=1-1" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfatK56hAZVOFUKEesaZWZgnj0BssAvBxHAREsRsdhN2fmoImWx3wpHvpekP_RP3A-880XwWu6rDmtVfqjhfcB6KVgWd6q3HmnTzOvbPkAQUAMlUeyAJ8U-Q3bFXchWzdlhG8ngzC0Bng/s400/why-revival-tarries-big.jpg" width="258" /></a></div>
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<b>7. In His Steps by Charles Sheldon</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/His-Steps-Charles-Monroe-Sheldon/dp/1619492660/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336486628&sr=1-1" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-OopCQbrHOnka9UQY11wBxuZ6P1pL3cvhPn8kq5tkeu861vqiK23gn1-RjCsVRS3zykWYavmn82J67yoEwe-IJ4Qc_f-K6-b0zX7-eQcyvEe98SetDKAn4iqjf9r57XynXsnB_1Bs98E/s400/inhissteps300.jpg" width="257" /></a></div>
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<b>8. The Ragamuffin Gospel by Brennan Manning</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/The-Ragamuffin-Gospel-Bedraggled-Beat-Up/dp/1590525027/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336486929&sr=1-1" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3FykNk3PnQth9s2BCfWMEZpSyPnCTvajZ48J8cYv_p3dnoYCUxxHoH0VUii_fmJRiQhLEgwZoosVJDLE3AfBshAVjUWi2o7DlofKEXlAK-yeJpe1sDJ0tFgwL9c11NYOFmAxVtT9SguI/s400/ragamuffin.jpg" width="245" /></a></div>
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<b>9. The Wisdom of Tenderness by Brennan Manning</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/The-Wisdom-Tenderness-Happens-Transforms/dp/0060724463/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336486997&sr=1-1" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhr1dt-VIYWyvBP6z8-FY86-uUJUoUisdUwuef9yjyEP4If8DYd_nfGIsC9LzsyMufWq2hiPcmsm-mxsaWqr20Er5-zO_goMFUeX2Ddm-wHP0UBQZ-b0vyCyAc2TjYw2iqALrC_AG3MWYY/s400/wsidom+of+tenderness.jpg" width="270" /></a></div>
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<b>10. Deep Unto Deep by Dana Candler</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Deep-Unto-The-Journey-Embarce/dp/0975562509/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336487133&sr=1-1" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8b-JM5HpaaBSYV58eSkVIK9zm_4ulBGw7tZt7C8HEtd1tYc2hhQP09EafdFvwtW3QH70MaL4xnQwoI0YsMI4fu9g6d6K30N0pb4Vicv38VHi_PstG0sjWkGsUGZZYA323HTIqA4TKV8k/s400/deepunto+deep.jpg" width="263" /></a></div>
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<b>11. Enjoying Intimacy with God by Oswald Sanders</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Enjoying-Intimacy-God-Oswald-Sanders/dp/1572930675/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336487228&sr=1-1" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQ4WEyOEXLWk4jVl7kM7nWKsISKsQcbCfDRDarmyqkRUvDHzSIYvYe0xO_cFwFJMP_PXyM66odkNVGYM9DXMwvyE6pRilt0ue0eRNXcw7TNzz8HgjSnscMuZDiSBFIWO2IRgqsY8pApho/s400/enjoying_intimacy_with_god.jpg" width="275" /></a></div>
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<b>12. The Pursuit of God by A. W. Tozer</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/The-Pursuit-God-Study-Guide/dp/1600661068/ref=sr_1_3?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336487318&sr=1-3" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisFcXCXy7vuxxsxTDGj-L9P770eeP24pxv_Pbx4N8PrfZCTHR0CyAty7LXDqqScUzRKnP_66-O1L2cQnuirXSifi46JRVcX2NcwS_WmoxihaHexz4F5-tNe3DmQkli2m1SQcj_eSBprxc/s400/the-pursuit-of-god.jpg" width="247" /></a></div>
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<b>13. Permission to Speak Freely by Anne Jackson</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Permission-Speak-Freely-Essays-Confession/dp/B0058M56IQ/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336487428&sr=1-1" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjIn6WW5nAWUSYUtgPxrhvhliO683G_bt35UV6UIClakbFC_uiX2CZZNopQa6O41oHUYYvjG6E9c7E1Tr2l561zE0cJL6BusuM1Mv9BFgDVIRMais7cX309q_pMV5dx7Ryu6nDie4Zj9g/s400/permission.jpg" width="290" /></a></div>
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<b>14. Hinds' Feet on High Places by Hannah Hurnard</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Hinds-Feet-On-High-Places/dp/1470184540/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336487553&sr=1-2" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4cWjddGYFOPq3cqg6HwLCv59WAoKSI09qgL-OZ1STriz22pCgXhiMG8R51EYjfI-Lv1jVb9NgH_OTUFZJ7zDKv8-vRWH1BBHVZ0Vs4pXGwgIBvozhscvtso3iVkcmM5UKHjougIdc9eE/s400/HindsFeet.jpg" width="250" /></a></div>
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<b>15. The Bible Jesus Read by Philip Yancey</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Bible-Jesus-Read-Philip-Yancey/dp/0310273579/ref=sr_1_9?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336487773&sr=1-9" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrC8t39H1YBX5mLelWtK9Bw2cCIgCuJZM91wAEZc_97NEn-lcW62VAijcR5I6w0_nHiT0zzOVK-UbtMYCEPLkZetEw7EQ01zqEPUk00MSUVlUS7tJlR2OHMuVnulTxdvtHo62jJx-i8UQ/s400/bible+jesus+read.jpg" width="257" /></a></div>
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<b>16. The Prodigal God by Timothy Keller</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/The-Prodigal-God-Timothy-Keller/dp/1594484023/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336487932&sr=1-1" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEFrwsB_Ho3XnFD_zwLi_OoFJq5mH0o-w08PdEAallfnAgmnJqU2OTeVRxlYy9errWzoXnbANwmCgSavV8xhSsOVkWmu5_Q8aXhgOzB573NCNGHMzAxFgc-LkN1sx0eDlPC-zmQUNHXj0/s400/Prodigal_God_small.jpg" width="285" /></a></div>
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<b>17. True Discipleship by William McDonald</b></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><a href="http://www.amazon.com/True-Discipleship-William-MacDonald/dp/1882701917/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336488103&sr=1-1" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEispwytlV1O3J9rMf0Z5jeRlz7JLAqOtVouToroaOtI_pfVqspoP4VlDbn0kVIDUAkYmLhC26Jm7aZcgDPgFdJgqh-fTDHLUYgOxyPPg_8qRnaXegkl6wJbyGwF2lhkI24dtXEum-Gifp8/s400/truediscipleship.jpg" width="238" /></a></span></div>
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<b>18. Passion and Purity by Elisabeth Elliot</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Passion-Purity-Learning-Christs-Control/dp/0800758188/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336488204&sr=1-1" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1tEr7MXcTUlMAmjGcDnWqHgm5DPIZS_36rNtbMQCWbSlt2S4h0bKHjZ0RHg3lHWf3FKUvFL7FgQ4IsGxjgNjQ5sAXvwvcnjw1EYEwrMaXZNX7bnlYaMQf-UH6_xt_jTnIvMfNH9QyF9A/s400/passionandpurity.jpeg" width="250" /></a></div>
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<b>19. Morning & Evening by Charles Spurgeon</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Morning-Evening-Edition-Devotional-Standard/dp/158134466X/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336488620&sr=1-1" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYB2kMiKAft6Zxd7XSEfGihiynywE1RJdQfCr9OreHZ8aEmW8CWvz50myk42Izg0_vyqAl63RpBlSo3X85lgAjSlT5pZlmSr__PmIW1mEeS0MXwP9989xG_aZH1EjF7_TFcEYNudjV45Y/s400/morning+andevening.jpg" width="271" /></a></div>
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<b>20. Whiter Than Snow by Paul David Tripp</b></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Whiter-Than-Snow-Meditations-Mercy/dp/1433502305/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1336488864&sr=1-1" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKnGIkli0CfN3-_As5a2g08sSdJQdwd6W03pyFHMc1ITxJf8X52uK51fvVOLbaeEXWvZ85YyfrBLv4XK9o9e7QRQPNAquOC3zG6d21gI9B9biPhO-iACj27tBaJF5Gfrp-QtoVD_Z079w/s400/whiterThanSnow.jpg" width="273" /></a></div>
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<br />Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-41721989710740742752011-12-31T20:52:00.000-08:002011-12-31T21:05:32.267-08:002011 in Review: It's the Little Things You Do.<b>It's the Little Things You Do.</b><div><i>Cold Tangerines: Celebrating the Extraordinary Nature of Everyday Life by Shauna Niequist</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>I'm in love with the simple truths found in this book. Each chapter is a little nugget worth more than I know. It was a billboard-size reminder of the legendary truth that God actually is really involved in the little things of each day and for that I am forever grateful.</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>One thing that I can say about 2011 is that I found God in the little things. Yes, He's always been there but it was this year that He won me over by using the little things that mean a lot to me to show me just how much He cared. He knows my heart so well. If you're asking what the little things are, then it's hard to explain. For me, it's finding a great book that fits the season of my life at a Thrift Store for cheap. Or it's catching the red light just to be in perfect view of the setting Sun. It's those things that mean a lot to me that I know He does just to say, "Courtney, I know that you love these things. I love you so much that I care about the things that you care." </i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>So without a doubt, I know that it's in the little things that You do that You win me over -- again & again. Once again, it reminds me that You are not some cosmic being that is univolved in my life. It's in the little things that You confirm that You really are real. That You are closer than I know. & more importantly, You show that You love me in a deep and personal way. </i><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: normal; "><i>Like a good Lover, You know the way to my heart. So</i></span></i><i> thank You for the little things because without them, I would believe so many lies about You. </i></div><div><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: normal; "><i><br /></i></span></i></div><div><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: normal; "><i>My favorite chapters in this book were Happy Thanksgiving and Writing in Pencil. Below is a link to an excerpt from Writing in Pencil. </i></span></i></div><div><br /></div><div>http://books.google.com/books?id=PXoddv8ejWgC&pg=PA203&lpg=PA203&dq=write+in+pencil+by+shauna+niequist&source=bl&ots=45laD9z8l5&sig=QrtV2TWXwhvG9jeZS5Dwng1qjgY&hl=en&sa=X&ei=_Of_TuuRN82Utwets4i-Bw&ved=0CC4Q6AEwAA#v=onepage&q&f=false</div>Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-28744434945579196332011-12-31T20:13:00.000-08:002011-12-31T20:46:57.235-08:002011 in Review: The Gift of Going Second & The Hard Lessons That Follow It.<div><b>The Gift of Going Second & The Hard Lessons That Follow It.</b></div><div><i>Permission to Speak Freely: Essays and Art on Fear, Confession and Grace by Anne Jackson</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>Consider this book as a Christian version of Post Secret. If you don't know what that is, then I'd suggest joining the rest of us by just simply Googling it. </i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>Permission to Speak Freely was probably one of the easiest books I have ever read. Not only because it had pictures but because I truly felt as if Anne was sitting across from me in a coffee shop and sharing her heart with me as I read. Her book is filled with raw stories and real revelation from the Lord that anyone can relate to - some simple, some complex. </i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>But nonetheless, it deals with some pretty tough issues like sin, confession, grace and fear. All areas that I find myself being pretty weak in. Few books have ever 'empowered' me like this one. </i><i>After reading it, I felt liberated to follow in the footsteps of the author and simply walk out the truths that she laid out. It challenged me to live out my story and to share it often. God is surely moving in my life and who I am to withhold the testimony that He has given me?</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>One lesson that was especially hard to learn this year was to come to terms with the reality that I'm broken and messed up. I can easily say that I'm not perfect, but my self-righteous, has-it-all-together, perfectionist mindset has a hard time believing those words much-less living them out. </i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>This year, I had to come face to face with the sin in my life. Ultimately, I just had to realize that my role in the Gospel was to be the one who was broken, sinful & in need of a Savior. I must rip off the mask that I am pressured to wear and begin to live a more vulnerable and less fearful life.</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>Confessing my sin still makes my weak in my stomach, but I am now grateful that He is teaching me to boast all the more gladly in my weakness for it glorifies Christ in my life.</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>Charles Spurgeon continued to teach me this, when I stumbled upon the following quote by him. "I have a great need fro Christ and I have a great Christ for my need." I am thankful beyond words that Jesus didn't mind getting His hands dirty with me this year as I began to learn how to deal with things in my life.</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>Take a second and read an excerpt from my favorite chapter in this book called, "the Gift of Going Second". May we always be those who give the gift of going second to those around us and boldly declaring that we NEED Christ all the more in our lives every day.</i></div><div><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(132, 135, 142); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS'; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; font-style: normal; "><blockquote style="overflow-x: auto; overflow-y: auto; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 10px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 10px; margin-top: 20px; margin-right: 30px; margin-bottom: 20px; margin-left: 30px; background-color: rgb(245, 245, 245); border-top-width: 1px; border-right-width: 1px; border-bottom-width: 1px; border-left-width: 1px; border-top-style: solid; border-right-style: solid; border-bottom-style: solid; border-left-style: solid; border-top-color: rgb(224, 224, 224); border-right-color: rgb(224, 224, 224); border-bottom-color: rgb(224, 224, 224); border-left-color: rgb(224, 224, 224); "><p><em>“Whenever somebody confesses something, and they’re the first to do it, it’s usually a pretty hard step to take. … What happens on the other side of that confession is something beautiful. … When you go first, you’re opening up this amazing opportunity for trust. You’re saying, ‘I’m broken.’ That trust carries so much power with it. It can give people the courage to go second. … It’s the Gift of Going Second that starts waves of confession and healing.”</em></p></blockquote></span></i></div>Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-78842268699423790612011-12-31T10:06:00.000-08:002011-12-31T21:49:39.373-08:002011 in Review: Jesus Christ is the Scandal of God.<div><b>Jesus Christ is the Scandal of God.</b></div><div><i>the Ragamuffin Gospel & the Furious Longing of God by Brennan Manning</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>Furious Longing was the first Manning book that I picked up and I fell in love with the profound simplicity of Brennan's writing. Furious was the doorway to what God was intending to do with Ragamuffin. Sheesh, what an adventure that is turning out to be.</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>Ragamuffin easily tops the rest of the books from 2011. Well, it might be tied with another but you'll find out about that soon enough. But without a doubt, I'll be revisiting this book for many years to come. Thankful to God for the journey that book brought me on with Him. </i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>Sometime this past year a good friend of mine took a minute to prophesy over me a very strong word from the Lord. She saw the Lord taking me on a journey that was going to change my life, the way I saw God and it was going to bring monumental amounts of growth for me in the Lord. Little did she know that now as I reflect on this past year all I can do is praise God for the accuracy of that Word. </i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>Here in hinds' sight, He did a work in me that shook me to my core. Little did I know that opening the Ragamuffin Gospel would be the beginning of a journey with the Lord that has changed everything in my life. </i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>"Because we approach the Gospel with preconceived notions of what it should say rather than what it does say, the Word no longer falls like rain on the parched ground of our souls. It no longer sweeps like a wild storm into the corners of our comfortable piety." pg 117, Furious Longing of God</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>This quote alone speaks volumes about who I was previous to reading Ragamuffin. I loved Jesus, yes. I read my Bible, yes. I went on missions, yes. But the journey He brought me on was one where He opened my eyes to the reality of the Gospel! Beloved, in doing that He made me come ALIVE on the inside! I found a TREASURE of infinite worth in understanding the implications of the Gospel for real! He became to me a source of Joy, of delight and of treasure!</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>I fell in love ALL over again!</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>"He has a single relentless stance towards us: He loves us" pg 18, Ragamuffin Gospel</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>"My deepest awareness of myself is that I am deeply loved by Jesus Christ and I have done nothing to earn it or deserve it." pg 23, Ragamuffin Gospel</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>"Jesus Christ is the Scandal of God." pg 101, Ragamuffin Gospel</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>I'm choosing to not un-pack the quotes above because you deserve a journey of your own in finding out the immeasurable riches of this glorious Gospel!</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>I only pray that He would do to you what He has done to me and by that I mean, would He simply seize you with His love. {see below}</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>"Over a hundred years ago in the Deep South, a phrase so common in our Christian culture today, born again, was seldom or never used. Rather, the phrase used to describe breakthrough into a personal relationship with Jesus Christ was, " I was seized by the power of a great affection."' pg 197, Ragamuffin Gospel</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i>May it be so Lord, for Your beautiful name.</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><i><br /></i></div>Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-13067747357138366512011-11-23T15:38:00.000-08:002011-12-05T20:04:10.081-08:00A Return to the Gospel: You are the God of my exodus.<div style="text-align: left;">[<i>scattered thoughts lead to messy posts.</i></div><div style="text-align: left;"><i>despite it all, my hope is that you would still </i></div><div style="text-align: left;"><i>see Him. hear Him. & turn to Him.</i></div><div style="text-align: left;"><i>for that is all that matters.</i>]</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>i once heard a teaching about how the exodus from Egypt to the Promise Land</div><div><div>was really a small journey that was elongated. <div>what took 40 dreadful years could have taken something like only 7 days. <div><br /></div><div>sounds a lot like my life.</div><div>what i so selfishly want is for one foot to be leaving Egypt</div><div>while the other is hitting fresh ground in the Promise Land.</div><div><br /></div><div>[quickness of journey is what i secretly desire.] </div><div><br /></div><div>i think, if we were honest, we all want it.</div><div>deep down inside.</div><div><br /></div><div>but still.</div><div>time is something i will never author.</div><div>only He will.</div><div><br /></div><div>something inside of me cringes at the idea of 40years.</div><div>why, Lord?</div><div>why so long?</div><div>is what i wine about often.</div><div><br /></div><div>i forget so easily that He has plans</div><div>that maybe don't line up with mine.</div><div>but they are full of beauty and one day i will trust </div><div>that they are best for me.</div><div><br /></div><div>maybe, just maybe...</div><div>those 40years cause something to arise inside.</div><div>maybe those 40years cause longing for the Promise Land.</div><div><br /></div><div>maybe, just maybe...</div><div>those 40years cause something to die inside.</div><div>maybe those 40years cause death to the Egypt within.</div><div><br /></div><div>maybe, just maybe...</div><div>the Great Shepherd knows what He is doing.</div><div>maybe He leads well after all.</div><div><br /></div><div>teach me to not despise the journey that You have me on, God.</div><div>to not hate the time You are investing in me.</div><div>oh God, <i>teach me</i> <b>to love You through it all</b>.</div><div><br /></div><div>but i know that You are a good Teacher.</div><div><br /></div><div>in hind-sight i realize one of the greatest lessons that i have learned</div><div>was what i feel has been Your plan all along.</div><div><br /></div><div>surely i have fallen and stumbled over my own two feet </div><div>sometimes more than others.</div><div><br /></div><div>but.</div><div>i'm realizing that through those dark nights of the soul</div><div>where i had to stare the flesh within me face-to-face.</div><div>it was in those nights.</div><div>in those dry & dessert filled seasons.</div><div>that You was doing surgery within me.</div><div><br /></div><div>because now i feel it.</div><div>i awake to realize that something monumental has happened within me.</div><div>something that i surely did not do to myself.</div><div>but something that You have marvelously done.</div><div><br /></div><div>"<i>for the righteous falls seven times and rises again...</i>" </div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>proverbs 24:16</div><div><br /></div><div>for the longest time, my battle was against my falling.</div><div>i strived and strived to eliminate my falling.</div><div>to exalt my perfection.</div><div>to limit my imperfection.</div><div><br /></div><div>but You have showed me the way of Life.</div><div>that You are the only thing to be exalted in my life.</div><div><br /></div><div>not my sin.</div><div>not my short-comings.</div><div>not my own weakness.</div><div><br /></div><div>and in the beauty of Your plans,</div><div>You have strengthened me to rise again.</div><div><br /></div><div>You could have taken away my ability to fall.</div><div>but instead You have made it for me</div><div>to NEED You. </div><div>You have designed it for me to run to You</div><div>time & time again.</div><div><br /></div><div>in the valley of weakness,</div><div>You have shown me that running to You is better.</div><div>far better.</div><div>than running from You.</div><div><br /></div><div>You put a craving for another place in my heart.</div><div>when it's so easy to look back to the egypt that i've come from.</div><div>i have come realize that it's nothing compared to the home You've showed me.</div><div><br /></div><div>the home that i have in You.</div><div><br /></div><div>a wise man once told me that abiding is simple.</div><div>though i didn't understand him then.</div><div>i faintly am beginning to now.</div><div><br /></div><div>he said, </div><div>'<i>abiding is to just keep coming back to Him</i>'</div><div><br /></div><div>though i wander, You always bring me home.</div><div>thank You, Jesus.</div><div>You are the kindest man i know.</div><div><br /></div><div>through all of my journey.</div><div>You have lead me well.</div><div>from my seasons of slavery.</div><div>to the places You have promised.</div><div><br /></div><div>teach me to call on You</div><div>as the God of my exodus.</div><div>for no one else will do</div><div>what You alone have done in me.</div><div><br /></div><div>until You speak again,</div><div>amen.</div><div><br /></div><div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div></div></div></div></div>Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-45006607130558967282011-10-20T07:37:00.000-07:002011-10-20T08:03:43.123-07:00Time to let my fingers dance upon this keyboard again.i can't remember the last time I wrote something from my soul.<br />it's been ages, i feel like.<div><br /></div><div>but yesterday i felt something stirrin'</div><div>and this morning i woke up knowing that today was the day</div><div>the day when the writer within would awake from its slumber.</div><div><br /></div><div>sigh.</div><div>it feel sooooo good to be back here at this place where i can let my heart</div><div>display the feelings it cannot express on its own.</div><div><br /></div><div>i am a different woman from the last time i wrote.</div><div>and my heart seemingly beats to a different drum. </div><div>similar yet different. </div><div><br /></div><div>and yes, a new season is where i have found myself</div><div>but at the end of the day He has stamped one thing upon my heart lately</div><div>and it will keep me here until He says otherwise.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>and here is what i have found that He has written: 'this too I have authored'.</div><div>such peace those five words bring me.</div><div>such hope as well.</div><div><br /></div><div>i find myself after three years of having a pulpit to talk, talk, talk</div><div>the same talking that expressed what i usually would write.</div><div>now without the flashy pulpit to talk, talk, talk</div><div>i will gladly resume the joy that i find in writing.</div><div><br /></div><div>so, i shall toast this morning to my fingers finally dancing again</div><div>upon the familiar place of a keyboard.</div><div><br /></div><div>finally, i am ready to write again. </div><div>after years of silence. </div><div>i am ready to speak with my hands again. </div><div><br /></div><div>so dance little fingers, dance.</div><div><br /></div><div>until He speaks again,</div><div>court</div>Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-85492872767338564962010-10-11T08:41:00.000-07:002010-10-11T08:43:11.497-07:00Music for the Soul. (please listen)<div style="text-align: left;"><object width="250" height="40"> <param name="movie" value="http://listen.grooveshark.com/songWidget.swf"> <param name="wmode" value="window"> <param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"> <param name="flashvars" value="hostname=cowbell.grooveshark.com&widgetID=22826762&style=metal&p=0"> <embed src="http://listen.grooveshark.com/songWidget.swf" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="250" height="40" flashvars="hostname=cowbell.grooveshark.com&widgetID=22826762&style=metal&p=0" allowscriptaccess="always" wmode="window"></embed></object></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-30440832352947340102009-09-25T08:47:00.000-07:002009-09-25T08:52:46.495-07:00seasons.<p>one of the main longings of my heart lately as<br />been for the Lord to just let me write again.<br />i rarely write like i used to ...<br /></p><p>on that note, i rarely take pictures like i used to.<br />so i ask the Lord to stir those passions within me and to let them flow like they once did.<br /></p><p>though i am learning of the new that i am becoming,<br />much of me anticipates the good of the old me that will soon return--<br />such like passions being restirred and adventures once longed for being fulfilled.<br /></p><p>lately, one of the greatest lessons that i haved learned<br />has revolved around one simple word: seasons.<br />surely solomon said it best when he proclaimed<br />that the Lord knows what He is doing in the grand scheme<br />of all of His timing and placement of people, places and scenarios in our lives...<br />ecclesiastes 3:1-14: </p><p>1TO EVERYTHING there is a season, and a time for every matter or purpose under heaven:<br />2A time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to pluck up what is planted,<br />3A time to kill and a time to heal, a time to break down and a time to build up, 4A time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, 5A time to cast away stones and a time to gather stones together, a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, 6A time to get and a time to lose, a time to keep and a time to cast away, 7A time to rend and a time to sew, a time to keep silence and a time to speak, 8A time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace. 9What profit remains for the worker from his toil? 10I have seen the painful labor and exertion and miserable business which God has given to the sons of men with which to exercise and busy themselves. 11He has made everything beautiful in its time. He also has planted eternity in men's hearts and minds [a divinely implanted sense of a purpose working through the ages which nothing under the sun but God alone can satisfy], yet so that men cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end. 12I know that there is nothing better for them than to be glad and to get and do good as long as they live; 13And also that every man should eat and drink and enjoy the good of all his labor--it is the gift of God. 14I know that whatever God does, it endures forever; nothing can be added to it nor anything taken from it. And God does it so that men will [reverently] fear Him [revere and worship Him, knowing that He is]. </p><p> </p><p>i remember the days that i hated being in a certain season of my life ...<br />whether it was the season of Him birthing perseverence in me<br />through the nagging long hours of high school or if it was through the<br />times when i was most impatient from summer to summer between each<br />travel and adventure that beckoned me to come.<br />i utterly hated them and wanted otherwise.<br />i wanted to be in that "next step" of my life ...<br />whether it was to be engaged or married or<br />at the honor academy or out of america and in<br />the beautiful soil of foreign land... all of it was<br />what filled my waiting and wantings...<br /></p><p>i spend countless nights asking the Lord to just<br />transport me through time but in my infancy,<br />i didn't know the richness of that time.<br /></p><p>i am sure that He listened to my pleas with<br />eager anitcipation for moments when those seemingly<br />useless nights would be revealed to me as full of meaning<br />and of great worth...<br /><br />so, here i am realizing the great worth of many<br />seasons that i didn't enjoy fully ...<br />that i didn't engage my heart into ...<br />that i didn't seek to know the Lord's purposes for...<br /></p><p>and now, i am provoked.<br />surely something He has evoked out of me ...<br />some purpose-filled desire to know the Lord of all seasons.<br />for He is the One who has solely crafted<br />and placed me into these seasons.<br /><br />God, draw my attentions my affections my<br />wants and desires towards You.<br />so that i won't miss another season and lose out on its richness..<br />may i wait just a little longer to<br />fulfill His purposes for this time...<br /><br />oh that i would be others minded<br />and not selfish in my desires.<br />for surely i want much for my life,<br />but who am i to know when would be the<br />best time for Him to turn the page?!<br /><br />Perseverance, come have your way with me.<br />come and complete your works in me<br />that i may move forward.<br />please, oh please don't pass me by ... you are necessary...<br />oh so necessary for me to trek forward into new seasons..<br />[ james 1:4 But let endurance and steadfastness and patience [and perseverance] have full play and do a thorough work, so that you may be [people] perfectly and fully developed [with no defects], lacking in nothing. ] </p><p>so Lord, i ask that you would help me to see<br />the beauty of this season.<br />the one that i am currently in.<br />come, reveal Your grand purposes for it to me.<br />i ask for Your mercies to be new right now to me...<br />surely, this journey costs me everything.<br /><br /><br />its all for Your beautiful name.... </p>Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-45862216037373446292009-03-29T13:30:00.000-07:002009-03-29T13:35:34.603-07:00HA Reflection Paper on Contemporary Issues:: Drinking[ March 29, 2009 ]<br /><br /><br /><div align="center"><br />Not given to wine, not combative but gentle and considerate, not quarrelsome but forbearing and peaceable, and not a lover of money [insatiable for wealth and ready to obtain it by questionable means].<br />1 Timothy 3:3I love the book of 1st Timothy where it lists the qualities of an overseer. I want to live a life worthy of the standards that it lays out. I want to be above reproach, but what does that mean or even look like?! The Lord is really shaping a lot of my ideas on ‘Contemporary Issues’ as I read more in His word. I want my life to align with it so much. As of right now, I do not have a firm stance on any given topic but I do know that I am heavily leaning towards the spirit behind all of what my stances will look like. Overall, I know that it is not what we do that matters but why we do it. That is how we escape legalism and other such things.<br /> Drinkng<br />Furthermore, he must have a good reputation and be well thought of by those outside [the church], lest he become involved in slander and incur reproach and fall into the devil's trap. In like manner the deacons [must be] worthy of respect, not shifty and double-talkers but sincere in what they say, not given to much wine, not greedy for base gain [craving wealth and resorting to ignoble and dishonest methods of getting it].<br />1 Timothy 3:7-8<br /><br /> Drinking<br /> As of right now, when I become of age I will drink wine on occasion. Occasions like for the practice of Jewish traditions or for Communion, or discretely for the sake of covenant between my husband and me in the chambers of our own home. Of course, I will stray far away from drunkenness but I my desire is to be an example of self-control to those who I influence. I do not want to be ‘given to wine’ in the sense that it owns or masters me. I think that my drinking of wine will not be a public thing but an intimate thing among those I love (husband, family and friends) as well as for somber moments for the glory of the Lord. All will be done with moderation.<br />“Overall, the Bible reveals a theology in which each individual is subject to a renewed spiritual conscience, responsible to God for his actions in light of such. We are not governed by the consciences of others, but are bound instead by the will of our beloved Lord. To deny another believer’s ability to respond to the leading of the Lord is the essence of legalism and a denial of the very freedom for which he was saved.” (Geoff Ashley, Pastor at the Village Church) To this I concur. I believe that my actions will affect those that I lead therefore I desire to present myself as one who walks out in the Spirit and not in the flesh. One who walks out in the flesh can not be trusted but one who is evidently walking in the Spirit or someone the unbeliever gives a good reputation towards (thinks well towards) can live with moderation. May my actions and life declare that it is possible by the grace of God to live with self-control and to enjoy wine. Personally, I am convicted that anything other than wine is not up for consumption. Wine is my limit. “Alcohol was created by God to be enjoyed within limits by His creatures. It can be used as an element in worship, celebration, thanksgiving, and partying, all of which are appropriate and God-honoring responses of the believer. Furthermore, science has evidenced and Scripture implies that moderate alcohol consumption can even have medicinal value. (1 Timothy 5:23) Some people will find that they are too susceptible to excess in order to worshipfully partake in moderation and will therefore be led toward a position of absolute abstinence. This is good in the sight of the Lord! Some will find that any consumption, within the confines of their unique circumstances, would result in a compromised witness and will therefore sacrificially refrain. This is good in the sight of the Lord! Some will find moderation to be acceptable to their conscience and circumstances and will therefore joyfully drink in such a manner. This is good in the sight of the Lord! None of the above positions are more holy or sinful than the others. Rather, all are expressions of the leading of the Spirit within a renewed heart and mind and should be embraced as such.” (Geoff Ashley, Pastor at the Village Church)<br /> <br /><br />All of my other stances run the same lines as this. All that I do, I want to glorify God. If I am in the room with a past alcoholic who struggles I will pray for them to continue to see victory and refrain. As for my own home, close friendships, and traditions towards my God, I will live a life worthy of the calling that He has placed on me.</div><div align="center"> </div><div align="center"> </div><div align="center">SCRIPTURE refrences:</div><div align="center"> </div><div align="center">Not given to wine, not combative but gentle and considerate, not quarrelsome but forbearing and peaceable, and not a lover of money [insatiable for wealth and ready to obtain it by questionable means].<br />1 Timothy 3:3</div><div align="center"> </div><div align="center">Furthermore, he must have a good reputation and be well thought of by those outside [the church], lest he become involved in slander and incur reproach and fall into the devil's trap. In like manner the deacons [must be] worthy of respect, not shifty and double-talkers but sincere in what they say, not given to much wine, not greedy for base gain [craving wealth and resorting to ignoble and dishonest methods of getting it].<br />1 Timothy 3:7-8<br /> </div>Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-23609412510885495922009-03-29T13:27:00.001-07:002009-03-29T13:30:01.795-07:00HA Reflection Paper on Week of the Ring[ March 13, 2009 ]<br /><br /><br /><p align="center">That week was a pretty weighty week if I can remember it right. I didn’t get to finish up the Week of the Ring for the Januaries because I left on Creation Fest then. The idea of the Ring Banquet was also unknown to me. So that made me anxious and really curious as to what I was getting myself into. Throughout the whole week I was reminded of the alumni that I knew. Some are faithfully diving into the depths of God while I was shocked to know some who are running as far away from God as possible. The reality of this “line” of graduates who went through this same program was hard to swallow. Around this same time, Jennifer was getting dismissed and it was evident that 7 months in the internship had no effect on her life. This alarmed me. I had to ask myself, “Is the internship continuously having a lasting effect on me?” I was afraid of leaving here, whenever that would be, and falling away from God because I knew what I was prone to do. When my best friend from home, Coco, came I was reminded even more of my old self and how I could easily go back to those old ways.<br /> Honestly, to be living a life of honor is to have a right perspective of myself, like truly knowing what I am capable of, and a right perspective of God, knowing what type of life He calls us to and living it. I want to live this way! For example, an honorable life can be lived out when you are pure. A way to live this out is to know how you are prone to lust and to be a whore but then you can grasp what God has called you to do and have hope. Therefore, the way that I can help restore someone in the line is by showing them what their flesh is prone to do which is to wander away from God but speak hope by showing them to live the way He has called them to. By using Scripture like in Psalm 119 when David asks God to “give him life according to His Word” and to “deal bountifully with him”, I wish they could see the life that He has in store for us if we submit to it. In short, the Week of the Ring put the fear of God back in me so that I remembered His hand in my life is what keeps me near Him and away from sin. My life after the HA, I pray, is so full of His grace that I would continue to run to the Secret Place of intercession and intimacy with Him. </p><div align="center"> </div>Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-47916824035901996732009-03-29T13:26:00.000-07:002009-03-29T13:27:47.574-07:00HA Reflection Paper on Peak Challenge::Mountain Climb[March 5, 2009]<br /><br /><div align="center">Reflecting back on our journey to Big Bend, I am so glad that I ended up going. In preparation for the climb, the Lord definitely pushed me a lot. I can see the Lord teaching me “endurance” in many areas of my life and I am sure that corporate is one of His most favorite arenas to do this!<br /> Previous to leaving for the mountain I was having some health issues and that caused me to contemplate not going on the hike. This was a difficult discussion because I definitely wanted the experience with my core but I didn’t trust the challenge. In the end the Lord had His way and the challenge of just choosing to go resulted in an increase of faith. But He is good like that!<br /> Apart from my memories with my core, I had many lasting memories with the Lord. Times like when I gazed upon the canyons before me, He reminded me of how little and minute man is compared to Him. In that, He touched on the pride in my life as He declared how gross it is! My eyes were opened to it as He showed me how one with pride is like a man who stands before those canyons and declares to be big and mighty. How many times have I done that before?! Yep, that beautiful site brought some good conviction! The majority of my moments of revelation with the Lord were just simple calls to obedience when He was speaking.<br /> One example of this was when we began our hike up the trail in the dark hours of the early morning. As the first one in the line, it was an intimidating thing to continue moving on when there were countless signs cautioning against mountain lion and mountain bear activity! Caution is one thing, but then it moved to instructions on how to react when seeing them. So, in those moments I had to chose to either grip onto fear and risk scaring all the others in my core (who were quite frankly smaller than me and more girly J ) OR I could trust the Lord and remember His promises. A lot easier said than done, but I did end up moving on. And needless to say, I am alive and well with no attacks from bears and lions!<br /> Throughout the whole hike, I really enjoyed myself. I am convinced that the Lord and I thrive in nature settings! Deep inside, I felt like a mountain woman and I am sure that I probably looked like one too! Overall, this was a great experience with both the Lord and my core as we bonded in a greater way and were all tested in many areas. It was great to see different sides of each other—the thriving side and the ugly side. But all of the trails and trials were equally as beautiful!</div>Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-17753170814340124842009-03-29T13:25:00.000-07:002009-03-29T13:26:56.847-07:00HA Reflection Paper on January Gauntlet[February 26, 2009]<br /><br /><div align="center">During January Gauntlet the Lord revived so much within me. Through re-experiencing the sessions and reading my old journal entries, I was deeply reminded of His hand in my life. For me, my gauntlet in August was literally life transforming and to be reminded of that stirred up much praise in my heart. From then till now, it has been evident that the Lord has had His way in me and it is a beautiful thing.<br />One of the more memorable sessions during this week was the 360 session with Holly Bailey. Honestly, 360 has been one of my least favorite classes all year but this session brought hope as well as healing. As she spoke, the Lord pierced my heart with His word and surfaced many hindrances that are deep within me. I felt the weight of that verse in Hebrews 12:1 that talks of striping ourselves of every entanglement.<br />One of the breaking moments of that night was when a testimony was being shared by a peer of mine who has been set free from a homosexual and self-pleasing lifestyle. To see such freedom happening in our midst shook us into the reality that freedom can be attained. As ministry time began to happen, I remember my guard began to rise and my heart wanted to replace the walls that have been recently broken down. In response, I decided to leave the auditorium as if to run away from this confrontation in my heart. Fear was creeping in and I began to leave. But as I did this, I hated myself for returning to my old responses and I felt the Lord speak tenderly to me as He sat me back down on the last row of chairs.<br />There in that back row the Lord re-broke me of my old ways and softened my heart even more. In the past, the altar of the Church has always scarred me and seemingly I strayed away from it. But that night the Lord beckoned me to the front where my lovely CA was standing at. At first I hesitated, but after I went up there the Lord ministered greatly to my heart. With tears flowing and the prayers of my CA, I saw the Lord revive hope in me. Hope that freedom can be attained and that His hand is not too short to save.<br />Though a small glimpse of what I have encountered, this is what the January Gauntlet was for me. It was a time for hope and a time for remembering. Overall, it was time where the Lord had His way. </div>Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-34716894090173818342009-03-29T13:24:00.000-07:002009-03-29T13:25:26.428-07:00HA Reflection Paper on Fall Fasting LTE[December 2, 2008]<br /><br /><div align="center">Looking into my lap at the commencement of the opening session, I was completely content. Therein laid my Bible in which I would soon indulge myself so deeply within that reality would be nothing apart from it. Accompanying this life-giving Book was a decorated notebook assigned to the revelations that I would receive while fasting. It was new with the pages still abounding in freshness but the weight of expectancy anticipated the overflow that would saturate.<br /> Worship began as the musical melodies invaded our ears. Countless times before I had been in that Auditorium room, listening to many of those musicians play, but oh how this time it felt completely distinctive. The expectancy level that I was experiencing on a personal level was indeed present amongst the corporate body of desperate interns and GIs. Focusing back on the Lord, I whispered a destitute plea of surrender begging Heaven to rapture this weekend’s activities and to have its way in my heart and mind.<br /> In that very moment as I knelt my “do this” and “do that” of an agenda before the Lord, I was filled with a righteous confidence. To state that Jesus Christ would rend the Heavens and enthrone my every capacity to contain was a sure thing. And as the days were ushered in and out, revelation came and satisfaction was produced. My heart overflowed with the rhythm of Heaven.<br /> To my flesh, most sermons were familiar in word and concept but to my spirit, most of the revivals in my heart were enticed by those familiar words. Because of those words something deep inside, to where the deepest in me abides, was enlightened and violently awakened to the reality of who God is. Not a frantic stirring of emotions but I am convinced that a deep uprooting took place in my heart as well as this longing soul of mine.<br /> Every desire and affection that was aroused during the Fasting LTE gave way to the Lord doing a strategic work in my life. Completely grateful am I for that weekend and since then I have found myself going on extended fasts for the sake of knowing who He is more. That one weekend completely produced a lifestyle of fasting and prayer within me. How I long to see what many more weekends like that will generate in my walk with Christ.<br /><br /> </div>Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-35925598901741689542009-03-29T13:23:00.000-07:002009-03-29T13:24:21.281-07:00HA Reflection Paper on ESOAL[ October 31, 2008 ]<br /><div align="center"> </div><div align="center">Waiting and watching, ESOAL began another long day with the roars of Facilitators demanding the participants to wake up. There the scrambling to readjust the dew encompassed helmets and to roll up the sleeping bags was the task at hand. Once finished, it was time to fall into place as a company. As the anxious, yet exhausted, participants stood at attention, the day was beginning with or without the Sun’s existence.<br /> At the start of ESOAL, each partaker voluntarily chose to engage themselves into this life transforming event. In doing so, they released their rights to have any concept of time. The sun and the moon were very deceiving as to somehow re-attain this. Another reality was deprived of the participants as well. This Emotionally Stretching Opportunity of A Lifetime began under the impression of lasting anywhere from 50-100 hours. With each challenging second, the end was much anticipated but without any concept of this, perseverance and endurance were the hope which rested on each individual.<br /> This relentless mentality drove the participants to push pass emotions and to reach the infamous status of BAR. Standing for Burial and Resurrection, this was the state of crucifying the flesh’s desires to gain a resurrection from Him that produces a righteousness that is not our own. In desperately wanting to walk out in BAR so that one would be empowered to go father than ever imaginable was worth any fight. And what a brutal fight this was! Consider what temptations would arise as Facilitators ate delicious food in front of the taste deprived participants.<br /> Let the simple example about food illustrate ESOAL’s battles. Taking every emotion and handling it with truth, so that in the end, the result would be eternal. As each difficult and stretching opportunity would arise, the interns would see their weaknesses surface and in their utter disgust the means to bring forth these frailties were worth the fight. It was a process of identifying and passionately crucifying.<br /> Amidst the countless hours of marching and the lack of sufficient sleep, each individual would consider the satisfaction of the entire situation being completely eternal and never temporary. Upon the end being announced, 77hours marked ESOAL’s toll on the bodies of the “finish-finishers”. It was effortlessly noticeable to see their aura was that of complete exhaustion and satisfaction worth savoring in. But upon their dirt stained faces, many had trails of tears. </div>Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-20318204845136468702009-03-29T13:21:00.000-07:002009-03-29T13:23:14.843-07:00HA Reflection Paper on August Gauntlet<p>[September 12, 2008]</p><p align="center">Gauntlet’s one week of intensity has lead to many changes in my life but one has left the mark of a life lesson. To describe that lasting impression solely as a discipline engagement of one’s mind, body, soul and spirit is to under state the vastness of Mr. Hasz’s challenge that he continually laid before us. With that, I now have the potential to reshape my entire year and determine how much of my life I allow Him to transform.<br />Waking up before the dawn and proceeding to attend countless sessions and meetings was a stretch for us to stay focused where needed. While the battle was forever raging between the lack of sleep nagging at our bodies or even the slight pains remaining from corporate, those were not the areas we needed to engage ourselves in at the time. The principle from Mr. Hasz that has wrecked my life is one of full engagement of your body, mind, soul and spirit towards the cause that it is being demanded of you in a certain moment. With throwing yourself completely into that involvement you have then disciplined your mind and emotions into a level of concentration. Thus you have found yourself in control over your emotions and thoughts which are a rare victory. <br />Jim Elliot once said that “Wherever you are- be all there”. Maximizing out that principle, Mr. Hasz has set the standard for what our involvement should look like. As the paradigm of excellence has been joined with every area of our lives for this year’s activities, we will have the choice to accept the challenge or deny it. Clearly we will receive the most out of the Internship by fully embracing what the Director deems vital but we must choose to see it that way. I am one who wants to experience all that I can while I am here so I have welcomed this challenge the most during Corporate exercise. While running and feeling every pain possible I have been learning what it means to control my emotions rather than have them control me. As I focus on the things above I find my body, mind and soul fall into line with His Truth. That is the standard I have now set myself at, not only this year but for my life.<br />With all that I have gained knowledge of during Gauntlet Week, I still see the lasting effects of this principle. I praise God that this is taking root in my heart and showing fruit in my life. Yet to say that this life lesson is just mere discipline is making little of the reality that it is indeed a lifestyle that is challenging yet so rewarding. Oh the joys of knowing how to control your emotions and thoughts to bring glory to Christ with your life!!<br /> </p>Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-59784555058798983302008-12-20T09:03:00.001-08:002008-12-20T17:28:13.477-08:00citylights, street fights.<a href="http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1206/1366095673_3ce52460b6.jpg?v=0"><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 500px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1206/1366095673_3ce52460b6.jpg?v=0" border="0" /></a> recently my fears have been centered aruond one or two main things.<br />so, i wrestle over them in my thoughts ...<br /><br /><br /><br />i <em>want to</em> wrestle them.<br /><br />so that one day, my loved ones <em>might not have to</em>.<br /><br /><br /><br />i have realized that i have a tendency to wander ...<br />going one way or the other... left or right<br /><br /><br /><br />its a simple truth that encompasses all of us.<br />we easily stray from our convictions ...<br />our beliefs ... wisdom... Truth... and ultimately Jesus.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />so i don't wrestle with the FACTual idea of us sinning<br />because i know that in me is NO good thing and that i<br />am utterly sinful to my core... okay, got it ... good.<br />we lean towards that.<br /><br /><br /><br />but i want to know why my wandering happens?<br />why resistence seems frail every time?<br /><br /><br /><br />i think proverbs 9 is now on my top list of favorite chapters in the Bible.<br />this is why ...<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />because (as ch 9 lays out) we travel down this metaphorical road in life<br />and on this road are <em>two voices crying out</em> to us ...<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />much tension<br />and altercaltions<br />are results of the differences<br />in these voices.<br /><br /><br /><br />rarely do they completely expose themselves<br />as to what their intentions are.<br />never have i been boldly or/and properly introduced either.<br /><br /><br /><br />on the <em>same </em>street these two <strong>allure</strong><br />one more enticing than the other on any given day<br />both flaunt their rewards:<br />one is temporary and seen<br />while the other not so much the same case.<br /><br /><br />one is easy and most travel with its guidance<br />while the other is less travelled yet it is highly<br />desired by those wanting more to life.<br /><br />they:<br />wisdom.<br />and folly.<br /><br />"they" cry out in the street as it is eluded to in Proverbs.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>folly.</strong><br />[chapter 9:13-18]<br /><br /><br />in description it is:<br /><br />noisy, knows nothing of eternal value, open to all forms of evil<br />and the invited guests to its house are already sunk in the depths of Sheol (Hell, death)<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>wisdom.</strong><br />[chpater 9:1-12]<br /><br /><br />description assures us that it is:<br /><br />(on the street) a tall house on pillars, maids cry from the higher places of the city (rather than folly's cry on her porch), inside this house is a prepared table, days are multipled and years increased and such occupants keep learning.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />sounds like biblical puzzles right?<br />sometimes i like to think so ...<br />because i get lost 2 words into it<br /><br /><br />but i wanted more.<br />so i dug into the essence of what it was saying.<br /><br /><br /><br />but apart from the text, i saw my life in unfold here.<br />like a movie.<br /><br /><br />i have had seasons where i toured through folly's house<br />after receiving her elusive invitation from the street.<br /><br />she was a loose woman to say the least.<br />her glam caught the lust of my eyes.<br />i was simple.<br />and she simply led me away.<br /><br />for days, months, years<br />i was ushered in to the depths of Sheol.<br />i was sinking into the lies<br />as folly opened up each new door<br />i didn't realize that these doors led up to new rooms--<br />of which were very appeasing to my curiousity--<br /><br />considence?<br />oh no.<br />i think it was more strategic than that.<br /><br />she knew very well how to keep her guests.<br />she did her homework and could easily convince<br />the "one-timers" to be extended customer,<br />constantly consuming these new rooms in this house<br />and finding themselves deeper inside than they wanted<br />but not knowing where to begin to exit.<br />she would not let thoughts of leaving being entertained.<br />i noticed this early on.<br /><br />this house was playing for keeps.<br />but in those times i could faintly hear<br />some please from a far ...<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />it sounded lovely---<br />and it was so very lovely---<br />soon, it was key to alluring me out of folly<br />and into the opposing house.<br /><br />wisdom.<br />entering into her house was very different from<br />that which i had previously visited before.<br /><br />to enter into the next room<br />required much devotion and action.<br /><br />the cherished verb of wisdom is diligent.<br />because must be so to increase.<br /><br />she knows what you want and<br />she wisely entices you with it.<br />guiding you into new journeys<br />of exploring <em>the depths of each room</em>.<br /><br /><br />the very first room---<br />i remeber experiencing this beauty years ago--<br />took on the persona of the oceanside front.<br /><br />your first step into wisdom's door was joined<br />with the mushing of snad beneath your toes<br />and your hair flipping violently in the wind.<br /><br />anticipation keeps your eyes open<br />as must from the sea washes you.<br /><br />it is there on the <em>shores of revelation</em><br />that you are invited to embark on<br />the <strong>most beautiful</strong> and the <strong>most satisfying</strong><br />journey that one could ever dare to explore.<br /><br />in this room as you are captivated by the intensity<br />set before your eyes, your ears can hear whispers of<br />the mysteries that are to come.<br /><br />again, anticipation holds your hand tightly.<br /><br />but in short,<br />that is what wisdom offers.<br />many never notice her for she is<br />only experienced truly once she is explored.<br />this can not be said of folly.<br /><br />wisdom's house is worn down on the outside<br />she is old. she is committed.<br />what she offers is not tangible.<br /><br />folly on the other hand is full of glam<br />and recent activity<br /><br />to the outsider looking in,<br />the depths of the ocean are never seen.<br /><br /><br />this is why folly can easily deceive.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />this street can get busy.<br />and it can get loud.<br /><br />i find myself torn most of the time.<br />duh, flesh vs. spirit.<br /><br />sure.<br />but i am torn because sometimes<br />i just want silence.<br /><br />but i know that in the long run<br />i don't ever want wisdom to stop speaking.<br /><br />if anything, may she fight for my attention<br />or atleast may i fight to hear her over<br />the clashing sounds of folly.<br /><br /><br /><br />my friends,<br />ponder today what folly and<br />wisdom really looks like in your life.<br /><br />it is quite intruging, to say the least.<br /><br /><br /><br />come Jesus. come.<br />let Your wisdom wash me<br />by the waterfalls of Your Word.Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-75922537856583531552008-12-03T20:08:00.000-08:002008-12-08T20:54:26.793-08:00taking inventory.day by day, i feel Him fighting for more and more and oh so more of me...<br />some days the victory is His and life abounds<br /><br />but then there are those days where the other has his way<br /><br /><br />and its in those moments that i see my ankles submerged in my shallow living<br />with the Truth mostly far from me<br />and with the advice of my enemies dripping from my ears<br /><br />why do i take hold of that which my body hates?<br /><br /><br /><br />going home for thanksgiving<br />tore deep inside of my being<br />made me question places of my heart rarely thought of<br /><br /><br />transformation?<br />change?<br /><br /><br />is it made from my hands?<br />is it the habitual behavior modification?<br /><br />or is it this Man's work<br />of sin ripped away and flesh executed in plain site?<br />is it holiness that hurts the eyes and the process that heals the heart?<br /><br /><br /><br />if i were to stand in the counsel of the wicked ...<br />or in layman's terms ... the atmosphere of my sins...<br />would i feel as if i were back at home?<br />or would i begin to itch with the sense of that which surrounding me<br />was the very thing that i opposed...i hated!<br />sin was no longer pleasing.<br />it was sickening.<br />it was repelling!<br /><br />no more alluring.<br />just EXPOSING.<br /><br /><br />go ahead!<br />plaster my sins...each and every dark one of them on the walls<br />of my home and of my school ...<br />let them know that my sin is <strong>acknowledged</strong> as SIN and that IN ME<br />lies NO GOOD THING!<br />and as i gaze upon this exposing of my heart<br />you can catch me somewhat bent towards Someone<br />yes, i am leaning<br /><br /><br />if it were not for grace.<br />this would be no gospel.<br />if it were not for love.<br />He would be no Christ.<br /><br /><br />the reality of my salvation is enticing me to take inventory.<br /><br />what is <em>really</em> happening in this heart of mine?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />transformation?<br />change?<br /><br /><br />let my hands cling to this rugged cross<br />and this discovery of grace in the form of this magnificent gospel.<br /><br />He who knew no sin became sin.<br /><br />the One who could stand admist the many struggles at a party<br />watching each one and knowing their heart better than even they did<br />seeing why they would impoverish their thirst in <em>those</em> drinks<br />and feel their feelings of despair as those pipes <em>only</em> take away the Breathe of Life that He has already given them.<br /><br /><br /><br />why do we take inventory of sin<br />and estimate how much we can get by with?<br />how much can the culture "not have a hold on us"<br />yet we still lavish praise on the way it grips us tightly?<br /><br /><br /><br />WHY?<br /><br /><br />why do we condemn precious Paul when he boldly exclaims<br />from his heart that everything else is NOT WORTH IT<br /><br />if it hinders him from Christ<br />may it be thrown in the sea like every other sin<br /><br />why do we draw the line at sin?<br /><br /><br />is not Christ our goal?<br />our prize?<br /><br /><br />oh how He deserves our highest glance.<br />our deepest enamored response.<br />our reckless abandonment.<br /><br />that's when i feel as if we really experience this gospel.<br />this beautiful gospel.<br />when our eyes leave ourselves and our pleasures<br />and are locked on Him.<br /><br />maybe its that way.<br />or maybe its not.<br />i am still searching.<br />i am still desiring to know.<br /><br />but i refuse to settle for what this gospel is NOT.<br />it is not a petty agreement to make Him feel good<br />by living a "good life"<br /><br />yet letting our heart get DARKER and DARKER<br />and the lies continue to pile up with the sins attached to them<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />when did this masterpiece of a gospel get hijacked?<br />because after taking inventory of the lies in my life<br />as i look around, i see nothing but the consumption of lies into the mouth's of His precious bride<br />and into those whom He desperately desires to expose satan and to reveal Truth to.<br />salvation.<br />oh, how it is needed to both the brothel and the betrothed.<br />the loved and the unlovely.<br /><br /><br />lies are running rampid.<br />but when has exposing the lies in your life<br />and in your heart been a popular and welcoming hobby?<br /><br /><br />...<br />i want a transformation to happen in this dark heart of mine<br />like that of paul's and i want to say with him as he declares...<br />" i count it all is lost...if only to know Christ and to have a righteousness that is not my own ..."<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />exposing lies.<br />ripping away sin.<br /><br />this is what i want my life to resemble.<br /><br />Jesus, this is my desperation spelled out.<br />we spoke about it earlier ...<br />but please, again i plea...<br />COME.<br />COME, LORD JESUS.<br />that's all that i am asking.<br />because i know that in Your presence...<br /><br />You abound.<br />come, make MUCH of Yourself.Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-9920613183913128962008-03-11T12:20:00.000-07:002008-03-11T20:46:39.785-07:00sometimes, FEAR remains. [[ but i love YOU ...]]TOO many times I write to be heard.<br />not only is that self-conceited but it betrays the<br />VERY essence of why people write.<br /><br /><br /><br />everyone from william shakespeare to jonathan swift<br />clearly portray that writers write in order to EXPRESS.<br /><br /><br />maybe it is what they are feeling or sometimes it is as far-<br />fetched as to release into reality a fantasy.<br />but nevertheless they write BECAUSE OF the here and now<br />that is happening to them.<br /><br /><br /><br />for weeks now i have carried this word and these words in my heart.<br />countless pages ripped up can testify that i have tried to put this DEEP emotion<br />into a perspective that does it justice.<br /><br /><br /><br />bbbbuuuuutttttt<br />tonight i saw a movie.<br />one that caused the SAME emotions that ive been feeling.<br /><br />and the combination of the two hit me deep.<br /><br />so now i am writing.<br />because of the HERE and NOW that causes my heart to be heavvyy.<br /><br /><br /><br />the pains.<br />the fears.<br />the rejoicing that eventually ALWAYS leads to mourning.<br />i knew it alllll too well.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />this movie was deeply secular but profoundly ME:<br /><br /><br />after a series of events, this crew of friends find themself<br />swimming next to their yacht that they forgot to release the<br />ladder to. 3 couples and one with a baby all alone on the boat,<br />which the mother was attending to when her old boyfriend<br />swept her up and jumped over board for fun.<br /><br /><br /><br />HOPELESSly they were on the side of this boat and eventually<br />as they freaked out some died to wounds due to their failure in trying<br />to get back on the boat.<br /><br /><br /><br />painlessly through the whole day the mom and dying dad<br />had to listen as their baby girl woke up and cried endlessly.<br /><br /><br /><br /><div>in the end it was just the ex-boyfriend and the mommy.</div><div>and as they executed their final plan to get back on the boat</div><div>in their near death state the mommy gets up there.</div><br /><div>she hurries and releases the ladder for the guy to tend to himself</div><div>and runnsss to her baby. there she comforts and aides until the </div><div>baby is quietly sleeping again.</div><br /><div></div><div>but she notices that the he never climbed up onto the boat.</div><div>and as she looks out into the dark ocean she sees him</div><div>swimming away and beginning to drown himself. (long story, it was </div><div>his fault the people died and the latter didnt go down)</div><br /><div>what was soo ironic was that the mommy didn't want to be there</div><div>on that boat in the first place. she had a past traumatizing experience</div><div>with the ocean where in her youth her and her dad were swimming</div><div>and he drowned.</div><br /><div></div><div>she never once wanted to go swimming or anything.</div><div>flashbacks held her captive.</div><div>but in that moment she knew that she had to leave her daughter</div><div>alone on that boat again and jump back into the ocean that just recently</div><div>held her very existence in its hands.</div><br /><div>and so she did.</div><div>diving in she swam down deep to rescue this guy.</div><div></div><div>and the story ends as the morning sunrise comes up and</div><div>another boat stumbles upon them to their rescue.</div><br /><div></div><br /><div></div><br /><div></div><br /><div>nice movie.</div><br /><div>but the trouble that won't leave me is that</div><div>the backbone of that plot is my very deepest fear.</div><div></div><div></div><div> </div><div>deepest fear:</div><div>with freedom clearly in sight and deeply desired</div><div>but the reality is that it is almost never attained.</div><div></div><div>truely the fear of never being rescued fully.</div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div> </div><div>i hate that sometimes i honestly feel like that.</div><div>seriously.</div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div> </div><div>and even to the deepest of my being, i sometimes </div><div>convince myself that freedom is just a lofty </div><div>thought that pretentious, religious people speak of.</div><div></div><div></div><div> </div><div>nothing ever attained by mere mortals who </div><div>are obviously sinners in all their failures and frailties.</div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div> </div><div>like this past week and a half i have done an uncommon</div><div>amount of testimony giving.</div><div></div><div>campus jam at my school, during the half time of basketball games, etc.</div><div></div><div> </div><div>and its not the whole ...</div><div><em></em></div><div><em>"my parents divorced.</em></div><div><em>i got saved.</em></div><div><em>and now things are peachy keen."</em> timeline either.</div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div> </div><div>no its diggin in deep and pulling out emotions</div><div>with past stories of how He came in to this life </div><div>of mine and wrecked it for the sake of HIS GLORY.</div><div></div><div></div><div> </div><div>i shocked myself that one friday night at the campus jam</div><div>where i was telling my testimony and i realized that that was</div><div>the most intense and raw and real testimony that i have ever given </div><div>of my life.</div><div></div><div></div><div> </div><div>and in all of its beauty ive been doing it again and again.</div><div>each time actually feeling the Truth that leaves my lips</div><div>and enters into their realm of knowing.</div><div></div><div></div><div> </div><div>that Jesus Christ came into this world to save sinners.</div><div>[1 tim 1:14-16, message version]</div><div></div><div> </div><div>hallelujah.</div><div>that is all good.</div><div></div><div></div><div> </div><div>but what troubles my mind at all hours of the day</div><div>is the fact that i am still caught in most of the things</div><div>that are in my testimony.</div><div></div><div></div><div> </div><div>why are they not defeated?</div><div>instead why am i the defeated one?</div><div></div><div>why Lord?</div><div>why is freedom a tease to me?</div><div>why does it seem like nothing more than</div><div>words and never an existing truth that my heart</div><div>feels ...?</div><div></div><div> </div><div> </div><div>why.</div><div></div><div> </div><div> </div><div>i guess this is where faith comes in.</div><div>as i just throw my hands into the air</div><div>and say, "its okay if i dont know freedom</div><div>or even if its a reality ... i'll just have faith.</div><div>believe in the unseen."</div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div> </div><div> </div><div>BUT i was not created to be unsatisified in my </div><div>desires for Him and the things of Him.</div><div></div><div>no, He comes to give Life and Life in abundance.</div><div> </div><div>so i will wait.</div><div>and learn of this Life that He gives</div><div>along with the freedom that He teaches about.</div><div></div><div></div><div> </div><div> </div><div>sooner or later, He will come.</div><div> </div><div> </div><div>i cannot see it</div><div>but i love YOU.</div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div><strong></strong></div><div><strong></strong></div><div><strong></strong></div><div><strong></strong> </div><div><strong></strong> </div><div><strong></strong> </div><div><strong></strong> </div><div><strong></strong> </div><div><strong>barely know You</strong></div><div><strong>by enter the worship circle</strong></div><div></div><div><strong></strong></div><div><strong></strong> </div><div><strong></strong> </div><div><strong>"<em>i dont understand You</em></strong></div><div><em><strong>but i love YOU</strong></em></div><div><em><strong></strong></em></div><div><em><strong></strong></em></div><div><em><strong></strong></em> </div><div><em><strong>i cannot explain You </strong></em></div><div><em><strong>but i love YOU</strong></em></div><div><em><strong></strong></em></div><div><em><strong></strong></em></div><div><em><strong></strong></em> </div><div><em><strong>i barely know You</strong></em></div><div><em><strong>but i love YOU</strong></em></div><div><em><strong></strong></em></div><div><em><strong></strong></em></div><div><em><strong></strong></em> </div><div><em><strong>i love YOU</strong></em></div><div><em><strong>i love YOU</strong></em></div><div><em><strong>i love YOU</strong></em></div><div><em><strong></strong></em></div><div><em><strong></strong></em></div><div><em><strong></strong></em></div><div><em><strong></strong></em> </div><div><em><strong></strong></em> </div><div><em><strong>think of You more as much as i can handle</strong></em></div><div><em><strong>i cannot belive how much You love me ..."</strong></em></div>Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-26271715808953891252008-02-27T11:16:00.000-08:002008-02-27T11:35:26.932-08:00music that you can drive AWAY with.<div><br />its just been a season in my life</div><br /><div>where i just dont get people and certain</div><br /><div>circumstances.</div><br /><div></div><br /><div></div><br /><div>and you drive around town </div><br /><div>and these people with their confusing situations </div><br /><div>leave you thinking ... </div><br /><div>and thinking ...</div><br /><div>and yeah, some more thinking.</div><br /><div></div><br /><div></div><br /><div>but these days, the last thing that you </div><br /><div>want tobe in charge of is the resolution of a situation.</div><br /><div></div><br /><div>so its in those moments that i plop (yes, plop!)</div><br /><div>a good cd in and just let the music soothe my soul.</div><br /><div></div><br /><div></div><br /><div>like some good norah jones or jack johnson.</div><br /><div>ixed with a little bit of the spill canvas and alanis morissette.</div><br /><div></div><br /><div></div><br /><div></div><br /><div>listening to songs that you can just </div><br /><div>think while listening to them without actually straining yourself.</div><br /><div></div><br /><div></div><br /><div>[[ just living. ]]</div><br /><div></div><br /><div></div><br /><div></div><br /><div></div><br /><div>music where thoughts are birthed</div><br /><div>nd constantly seem to flow.</div><br /><div></div><br /><div>yeah, thats where you can find me for </div><br /><div>the rest of this week.</div><br /><div>right in the dead center of those type of songs.</div><br /><div></div><br /><div></div><br /><div></div><br /><div>[[ and it is there with the mixture</div><br /><div>of other words and Truths </div><br /><div>that we can continue to let</div><br /><div>o u r </div><br /><div>hearts come alive. ]] </div><div> </div><div> </div><div> </div><div> </div><div> </div><div> </div><div> </div><div> </div><div><br /><a href="http://hs.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=469207&op=1&view=all&subj=8159929286&aid=-1&oid=8159929286&id=725133524"><br /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihQLVWtFla07TEYGrUL0BKLLui-XD9jGoSUfJmUddmR5HXhHMltYRjEsb5dOFw1OwRHzCF3RUtO2MWLDRtmwLP20WtMEFHTkecPUDJ9eigcQ-QhxC6ol0Fg8bR1JeHw4x94s40PbqLF-E/s1600-h/IMG_0698.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5171745520555226610" style="CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihQLVWtFla07TEYGrUL0BKLLui-XD9jGoSUfJmUddmR5HXhHMltYRjEsb5dOFw1OwRHzCF3RUtO2MWLDRtmwLP20WtMEFHTkecPUDJ9eigcQ-QhxC6ol0Fg8bR1JeHw4x94s40PbqLF-E/s320/IMG_0698.jpg" border="0" /></a></div>Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6976329678808499755.post-21161234918544992142008-01-25T13:42:00.000-08:002008-01-25T14:34:38.753-08:00take this walk with me.<div align="right"> </div><div align="right"> </div><div align="right"> </div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;">my heart is like a child longing to travel</span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;">with every mile it continues to unravel<br />my heart is like a house awaiting a deep cleaning<br />apart from the dust of old days i am leaning<br />my heart is like a bride upon an altar who shakes<br />faint with love i am here to wait</span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;"><br /></span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;"></span></div><div align="right"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHX22zky_OH-ligoP3spjfkjPQ0IiNR2M2vozX_ipFkzWi2G6WVvMqD1H0A_MwRJD7zVUF0h8UVc6kzbDtXZjGOfjrgymuk1InOZ1WiPtKy-eXi_XyyeXKNZZH-InMTG6cjxTz1lHy3_c/s1600-h/change1si3.jpg"><span style="font-family:courier new;"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5159544831043873186" style="FLOAT: left; MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHX22zky_OH-ligoP3spjfkjPQ0IiNR2M2vozX_ipFkzWi2G6WVvMqD1H0A_MwRJD7zVUF0h8UVc6kzbDtXZjGOfjrgymuk1InOZ1WiPtKy-eXi_XyyeXKNZZH-InMTG6cjxTz1lHy3_c/s320/change1si3.jpg" border="0" /></span></a><span style="font-family:courier new;"><br /></span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;">wait upon the days of new life and new words<br />new grace and mercy He has assured</span></div><div align="right"><strong><span style="font-family:courier new;">come and take a walk with me down MY street</span></strong></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;">these are my friends and my family, don't you see?</span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;">they take advantage of life as they go</span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;">with every bad choice it might unfavorably explode </span></div><div align="right"><strong><span style="font-family:courier new;">so take this walk with me</span></strong></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;">as i seek out to return a penny<br />for you don't understand<br />this life was never in a human hand</span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;">i live to love and i love to live</span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;">i'll show you my pride that i struggle to forgive<br />cause in the end i count my days</span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;">easy or hard i give and i pray</span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;"><br /></span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;"></span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;">all of your change i will turn away</span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;">im setting sail from a dock no longer at bay</span></div><div align="right"><strong><span style="font-family:courier new;">still won't you take this walk with me</span></strong></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;">the reality of a need to live this life a lot differently</span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;">hear me once, hear me twice</span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;">i strive for what no martin luther could advise</span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;"><br /></span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;"></span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;"><br /></span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;">a change in the heart is a change in the life</span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;">to you who breathes and thinks, for this may you strive</span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;"><br /></span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;"></span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;"><br /></span></div><div align="right"><span style="font-family:courier new;"></span></div><div align="right"><br /></div><div align="right"></div><div align="right"></div>Courtneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02123476676642844080noreply@blogger.com0