During January Gauntlet the Lord revived so much within me. Through re-experiencing the sessions and reading my old journal entries, I was deeply reminded of His hand in my life. For me, my gauntlet in August was literally life transforming and to be reminded of that stirred up much praise in my heart. From then till now, it has been evident that the Lord has had His way in me and it is a beautiful thing.
One of the more memorable sessions during this week was the 360 session with Holly Bailey. Honestly, 360 has been one of my least favorite classes all year but this session brought hope as well as healing. As she spoke, the Lord pierced my heart with His word and surfaced many hindrances that are deep within me. I felt the weight of that verse in Hebrews 12:1 that talks of striping ourselves of every entanglement.
One of the breaking moments of that night was when a testimony was being shared by a peer of mine who has been set free from a homosexual and self-pleasing lifestyle. To see such freedom happening in our midst shook us into the reality that freedom can be attained. As ministry time began to happen, I remember my guard began to rise and my heart wanted to replace the walls that have been recently broken down. In response, I decided to leave the auditorium as if to run away from this confrontation in my heart. Fear was creeping in and I began to leave. But as I did this, I hated myself for returning to my old responses and I felt the Lord speak tenderly to me as He sat me back down on the last row of chairs.
There in that back row the Lord re-broke me of my old ways and softened my heart even more. In the past, the altar of the Church has always scarred me and seemingly I strayed away from it. But that night the Lord beckoned me to the front where my lovely CA was standing at. At first I hesitated, but after I went up there the Lord ministered greatly to my heart. With tears flowing and the prayers of my CA, I saw the Lord revive hope in me. Hope that freedom can be attained and that His hand is not too short to save.
Though a small glimpse of what I have encountered, this is what the January Gauntlet was for me. It was a time for hope and a time for remembering. Overall, it was time where the Lord had His way.
One of the more memorable sessions during this week was the 360 session with Holly Bailey. Honestly, 360 has been one of my least favorite classes all year but this session brought hope as well as healing. As she spoke, the Lord pierced my heart with His word and surfaced many hindrances that are deep within me. I felt the weight of that verse in Hebrews 12:1 that talks of striping ourselves of every entanglement.
One of the breaking moments of that night was when a testimony was being shared by a peer of mine who has been set free from a homosexual and self-pleasing lifestyle. To see such freedom happening in our midst shook us into the reality that freedom can be attained. As ministry time began to happen, I remember my guard began to rise and my heart wanted to replace the walls that have been recently broken down. In response, I decided to leave the auditorium as if to run away from this confrontation in my heart. Fear was creeping in and I began to leave. But as I did this, I hated myself for returning to my old responses and I felt the Lord speak tenderly to me as He sat me back down on the last row of chairs.
There in that back row the Lord re-broke me of my old ways and softened my heart even more. In the past, the altar of the Church has always scarred me and seemingly I strayed away from it. But that night the Lord beckoned me to the front where my lovely CA was standing at. At first I hesitated, but after I went up there the Lord ministered greatly to my heart. With tears flowing and the prayers of my CA, I saw the Lord revive hope in me. Hope that freedom can be attained and that His hand is not too short to save.
Though a small glimpse of what I have encountered, this is what the January Gauntlet was for me. It was a time for hope and a time for remembering. Overall, it was time where the Lord had His way.
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